What does the word hospice mean to you?

[gailpope]

What does the word hospice mean? This question brings up a myriad of memories for me.

Growing up in England I learned that hospice is a place where people go to die and also that hospice care is given to someone who is dying. The only people who could help me understand anything deeper than that were my mum and dad and they NEVER talked about death other than in hushed terms, and for the most part avoided the subject like the plague.

Let’s fast forward through the early years of BrightHaven to when I started caring holistically for many senior and chronically ill animals. Of course they died – most of them naturally, in peace and with dignity. The road to the end of life was joyful and without fear – in fact we concentrated on living and not dying.

When I was approached to join the board of directors for a new animal hospice organization I instantly refused, saying that I had no experience of hospice care and had no wish to have that experience. Our animals’ lives were all about living and not dying. I was delighted when I discovered that I had actually been practicing true hospice care for many years.

Shortly thereafter my mum reached the last chapter of her life and was cared for at home with us. All members of her hospice team had to be very careful to never mention the words hospice or dying to her as she sadly remained fearful of the two until the day she died.

My experiences have instilled in me a burning desire to help people to trust hospice care and its path through the last chapter of life and to help their animals live joyfully and fully through their last breath.

In BrightHaven’s new Holistic Actions! course about holistic animal hospice care, not only do we share BrightHaven’s approach, we also endeavor to help people better understand what death is and what it is not. We’ve found that knowledge reduces fear and may even lead to a deeper acceptance of death, which can possibly help us humans to live more fully!

So what does the word hospice mean to you? Carol and I would love to hear your perspective.

 

[Dr. Jeff]

Thanks so much for your wonderful and inspirational post Gail.

To me, the word hospice is almost synonymous with the dying process and a "bad" diagnosis.

And like diagnoses, hospice is not equivalent to a specific outcome (in this case dying).

I know many people and pets who have "failed out of" hospice by far exceeding the quality and length of life predicted for them from their doctors.

As you say, "live well until that last breath".

 

[Deena]

For me, hospice means to allow the life cycle to proceed the way mom nature designed it to, while focusing on quaLity of life and comfort measures...if needed. Using the BrightHaven approach, I was gifted the opportunity to watch my kitty Clara pass on her own terms, in her own way, at her own time. It was an amazing experience. Clara was 23. Thank you Gail for your amazing resources.

 

[gailpope]

That is such a beautiful photograph of Clara - thank you Deena for sharing it, and also for your beautiful way of expressing the journey you took together as an opportunity gifted to you. To have a beloved one pass on their own terms, in their own way, and at their own time in peace and comfort is indeed a most precious gift.

 

[gailpope]

Thanks so much for your wonderful and inspirational post Gail.

To me, the word hospice is almost synonymous with the dying process and a "bad" diagnosis.

And like diagnoses, hospice is not equivalent to a specific outcome (in this case dying).

I know many people and pets who have "failed out of" hospice by far exceeding the quality and length of life predicted for them from their doctors.

As you say, "live well until that last breath".

Thanks Jeff – I agree. Over the years we have taken many animals after a “terminal diagnosis” and seen them return to better health and vitality. I would really love to have people view the word “hospice” as meaning a time that brings loved ones together filled with love and healing and not regarded as synonymous with death.

For us it is all about “healing for the highest good” rather than seeking to cure a dis-ease, and that can mean healing for new and renewed life or healing to follow the path to the afterlife.

 

[carolhulse]

Many years ago, I too used to think that hospice always meant dying. If you were in hospice, that was it – death was imminent and there was no turning back.

Then I had my first experience with hospice, when my beloved husband Martin was nearing the end of his life after a gastric cancer diagnosis the previous year. Fear and my prior misconceptions about hospice weighed on me, but I also marveled at how relaxed he was. I got my first glimpse of what it means to live fully through the last breath, although I didn’t know it at the time.

About 9 years later, I had a firsthand encounter with animal hospice with my cherished canine companion Silver. I quickly noted the similarity between animal hospice and human hospice, which was very comforting to me.

I learned an extremely important lesson about being fully alive until death. A few nights before Silver died, I was lying next to her on the bed and thought, “I’m lying next to a dying dog.” Then I realized, “No, I’m lying next to a living dog. She’s still alive and must be treated accordingly.” My goal remained for Silver to feel as balanced, comfortable and at peace as possible, and surrounded by love, honor and respect. Again it’s all about living well—in an optimal state of balance—through the last breath!

Although it was challenging and exhausting at times, I wouldn’t have missed this amazing journey, full of love and life lessons, for anything! In fact, I felt so greatly moved by my experience that I wrote a book called Walking With My Dog Through (End of) Life that shares our journey from Silver’s terminal diagnosis of hemangiosarcoma through palliative care, hospice care and a peaceful, gentle and natural death. My book is available on Amazon at Walking With My Dog Through (End of) Life: Carol Howe Hulse: 9781537597188: Amazon.com: Books.